Sister: How's your "United States of the Nether Lands" coming along? Almost end of September na.

Me: Dead.

Sister: Why? YOU GOT LAZY AGEEEEEN!

Me: Nope. Main character's a sue. Stu. Sue. Whatever.

Sister: How is it a Sue?

Me: He's an advertising guy who's in hell gypping the actors and the politicians. Sound familiar?

Sister: But he's got no fashion sense whatsoever, wears ill-fitting clothes, has messy hair, is unsociable, has no people skills, is bad tempered and... I see what you mean. Why didn't you just go all the way and make him wear glasses?

Me: He does. Dark glasses. So the fires of hell don't hurt his eyes. Also 'cause I made him crosseyed. And hunchbacked. Does that make him less of a sue?

Sister: No. But you could pass it off as an author insert.

Me: Really? Is that more acceptable?

Sister: No, but it's really creeping me out hearing you say "Sue."

Me: Maybe I'll give him three pesky demons patterned after you, Mom and Jackie. Andun na rin lang tayo.

Sister: Are they vavoom shapely temptresses, kinda like corrupted versions of The Three Fates?

Me: No, the three little pigs.

Sister: Waaaaaaaah! You're meeeeeeeeeeeeeean! I haaaaaate youuuuuuuuu.